An instance of rejection sets people back years. Nothing progresses in their life as they review the event over and over again.

Loss of sleep,  mediocre social interactions, career and relationship opportunities are shunned by limiting beliefs cause by previous rejection experiences.

You are stuck. Your mind replays the events of a disheartening rejection as if taking some carnal pleasure in the mental agony. Maybe it was the loss of a job, a betrayal by a close friend or your partner being obtrusively honest about your sexual relationship, then dumping you.

It could be something simpler like someone saying “NO” when you make a request.

Perhaps a business lead, a job interview, a potential date or even entry into a nightclub or restaurant.

Rejection can be as subtle as a cold shoulder or as apparent as a public humiliation.

Regardless of the weight of the experience the emotional carnage that we endure is the same.

The popular cure is to shun what others think about you – it’s what you think about yourself that really matters. This advice although true, rarely helps anyone get over a bout of rejection.

Our ego is hurt, we feel low, we feel undesirable, unwanted, unloved and insignificant. We undergo these emotions because we intrinsically and subconsciously really do care about the opinion of others.

After all the external appearances of our lives are put up for the approval and acceptance of everyone else.

To overcome rejection rather than shunning others opinions about you, which will almost always work against you, realize that no matter what state you are in, there will always be those that will disapprove, criticize and reject your being.

That’s a fact of life. Even if you are the best at who you are, what you do, the most popular, the most desirable, sometime, somewhere you will still experience rejection.

And when you do, this will be devastating because most of what you struggled to achieve was a guise to gain the approval of others and once that reality is shattered you are eternally lost. Everything that you have seemingly worked for is of no value anymore.

The key to overcoming rejection is not work for the approval of others – they are not the standard. You are the standard. Everything you do, every task you undertake, every endeavor has to be done from the frame that you need to improve upon yourself.

You are the only judge.  As time labors on, if you haven’t improved in your field of expertise, your relationships, your friendships – then you can reject yourself and start again. You owe it to yourself.

You set the bar and only you judge your accomplishments. Friends, enemies, family, co-workers, bosses and spouses will all seek to criticize, discredit, humiliate and even hold you back.

It’s a very hard fact to accept but most people, no matter how seemingly close they are to you don’t want to see you succeed, and especially don’t want to see you succeed after overcoming all the adversity they can throw at you. People want the rest of the world to wallow in their inability to accomplish anything.

A lot of people will assume to help you, but only to a certain level. Once they face the threat that you might surpass them in whatever form and function, out comes the rejection and adversity.

There are a select few, even a handful of people in our lives that genuinely and wholeheartedly want to see us do well. Most often they are not the ones we think they are. Sometimes they are our harshest critics or the ones that seem not to care but edge you on subtly.

Use their support and improve upon yourself. Once you set yourself as the standard any outside rejection  can be overcome by taking solace in what you have accomplished. You know that no one else can take that away from you.

Their rejection of you is just a reaction to your success. The more successful you become the harsher the naysayers and the rejections, so you need to have that pool of personal experience and accomplishments to fall upon on times like these.

Strive. Strive diligently and go forward. Most obstacles are mental regurgitation’s  of those who are jealous or don’t want to see you succeed. It matters not if success is only dependent on your terms.

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